Mae West Fest VII

July 24 - 27, 2003


The Shows

*listing is alphabetical by title of the performance**use your back button to return to the archive*


2 Characters in Search of an On-Ramp                sexy mime

writ/dir by Lou Clark

dramaturg Sarah Malkin
10 min

Drew and Bill are ON THE ROAD AGAIN! Destination: East Village, New York City! Will they find a fresh cup of coffee between 4-5am? Does the Yaffa Cafe ever really close? Will they ever find an on-ramp for the FDR, so they can get back home? The answers to these questions and more in the latest installement of Lou Clark's road trip series, in the follow up episodes to 36 Hours in Pittsburgh& Road Trip'n!

A Faint Odor                                                             mature/sexual content & images
by Tara Melinkovich
dir by Amber Era-McGarvey
20 min

They came out of nowhere!
Busting, Bulging, Swelling,
Out of Nowhere.
Out of Skin and Bones.
Out of a girt as small as a mouse
Came-Rolls, Dips and Divots...Fat and Fear.

Agt Jane Episodes 1 & 2                                           mature content

by Janea Boyles
dir by Lisa Sanphillipo
15 min ea

Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to attend the heart pounding, hilarious adventures of world famous, lesbian spy, Agent Jane and her undercover counterparts. The battle against homophobia and stereotype continues to rage as Agent Jane returns this year in Episode Two: Operation Holy Roller to take on Reverend Jerry Smallcell in the midst of his evangelistic amusement park empire. Don't miss this zany, slightly horny spy meet her match!

by Margaret O'Malley
dir by Beth Raas
10 min

Holidays can bring out the best and the worst in families. What happens when a mother and daughter who can't stand to be in the same room must spend Christmas together AND plan a funeral at the same time?

Beata Beatrix

by Britteni Sojka

dir by Britteni Sojka
45 min

Sex, Drugs, and a little Pre-Raphaelite Art. A seance for the bad boys of the Brotherhood and the women who haunted them. Art imitates life imitates art imitates death amid this evocative labyrinth of desire and self-expression.

Blink                                                                          mature content/language
by Janice Kennedy
dir by Ellen Graham
15 min

The ghosts of a man's past visit him during a surreal encounter with a mysterious woman on the eve of his release from prison.


Bones of the Building
by Beth Amsbury
dir by Carys Kresny
1 hr

Experience the biography of a house across fifty years and five owners. Does your personality change if you wear a shag rug over your parquet floor? When is a house a home? What is the home of your bones? The story is approximately 79% true. And the rest? Only Beth's grandparents know for sure. Amsbary's work has been described as "Irreverently clever and downright amazing: a must-see." (Seattle Weekly). Selected for the first FringeACT Festival. -

Call in the Family                                                    mature content

by Margot Bordelon
dir by Margot Bordelon & Andrew Geske, AD
1 hr

For over two decades, Frida, Sandy and Clara have been dedicated employees of PB&Ja phone company of mammoth proportions. Now, as their 25th year of service comes to a close, so does a year long competition going on between them. The winner of this high stakes contest walks away with all three 25-year appreciation plaques. A tastefully kitschy Urban Fairy Tale about greed, deception and listening in on other people's phone calls.

Chicken Ranch                                                         mature content/images

by Roxanne Ray
dir by Lauren Appel
25 min

Takes satirical aim at the social swirl of recent births of sextuplets. The play interweaves the dilemmas of such difficult multiple births with other more taboo kinds of sexuality, highlighting common elements of fantasy, scandal, and generosity in realms that appear diametrically opposed. Incorporating influences from photography, particularly the work of Rineke Dijkstra and artist Joseph Cornell, Lauren Appel's direction draws upon the links between eroticism and the stillness of geometry.

Cosmic Goofs

by Barbara Lindsay
dir by Kelleen Conway-Blanchard
25 min

Cosmic Goofs is a sweet funny look at loving someone wrong and horrible who is the rightest someone. Right?

Couples & Down With Mommy
by Louise Zamparutti
dir by Cara Anderson

20 (2 pieces) 10 min each
Two ten minute plays about loneliness, love, life, and death by Seattle playwright Louise Zamparutti. COUPLES is a love story: Boy is trying to cross the street. Boy meets Girl. Girl wants to cross the street. Now what? DOWN WITH MOMMY is about, well, just that.


Daisy with Asters                                                      especially well-suited for families & children
by Toni Douglass
dir by Meleesa Knappert

performed by Barbara Callander
45 min

What do you do when you're the child of the wealthy, the wife of an English aristocrat, a plain jane, and a crazy Daisy? Found the Girl Scouts, of course! Meet the original "J Lo" - Juliette Gordon Low - ... , a late blooming eccentric who chats with her dead parrot. At the age of 50, Daisy Low hatched a brilliant idea that opened doors for millions of girls in her time and beyond.

Detection                                                                   mature language
by Amy Johnston
dir by Katie McKee
30 min

Two detectives who couldn't detect their own feelings if they reached up, grabbed them by the ears, and licked them on the nose, investigate a mysterious dead body that probably isn't a body at all. With all of the randomness (and banter) will the detectives ever discover the clues they need to solve the case? In Detection, you never can tell.

Embracing the Undertoad                                        mature content/language
by Robin Rice Lichtig
dir by Teresa Thuman
1 hr

Award winning play about the mystical bonds between family members and loved ones that can both immobilize us and set us free. A waitress, her lesbian lover and her tuned-into-the-aura-of-the-universe sister struggle for love, life after death and sanity one stormy evening in North Carolina.

Ghost Love
by Sara Hayes
dir by Sara Hayes
30 min

When a ghost invades the home of Clara and Jessica, it appears to have more than a personal interest in their struggling relationship. GHOST LOVE by Sara Hayes ...because love is a tricky game.

Jewish Thighs on Broadway                                                mature content/brief partial nudity
by Penny Orloff
dramaturg Llysa Holland
1 hr

Breaking into Show Business is like breaking into Fort Knox; breaking out, we're talking Alcatraz. This newest version of Jewish Thighs on Broadway, based on Penny Orloff's critically-acclaimed solo show and her recently-released novel of the same name, is populated by an oddball immigrant family, on-again-off-again lovers, diets from Hell and a Rogue's Gallery from the Showbiz underworld.


Las Tres Marias                                                         mature thematic content
by Carmen Carrión, Marta Sanchez, Fiona J. Torres
dir by Leticia Lopez
featurinng Brenda Arellano, Jennifer Michele, and Myriam Marquez.
35 min

Love, faith, and identity take center stage in this sensual, humorous, and poignant exploration of the hearts of three Latin women. This ensemble play showcases three faces of the Latin woman - the Virgin, the Seductress, and the Mother. Linked universal themes weave the narrative threads of virginity and sexuality, birth and death, love and re-birth, into a sensual tapestry that take us from the kitchens, to the bedrooms, to the altars, and into the secret hearts that resonate with the voices of The Three Marias.

Lou's Lanes
by Dickey Nesenger
dir by Heidi Heimarck
15 min

The allure of sexual deviation and its corruptive powers as evidenced by a young woman who returns home with her husband.

Pink Porcelain                                                                      smoking/mature language

by Heather Nicholson
dir by Nicole Boyer Cochran
25 min

Mother and daughter relationships are fragile. and funny. and sad. and happy. and confusing. Listen, experience, and remember...

Pop Culture Princess                                                           mature content

by Elizabeth Whitney
40 min

Did Wonder Woman really use her invisible jet for crime-fighting, or for cruising chicks? Would you enjoy seeing Barbie reinvent herself as a postmodern feminist performance artist? Do you want to see Ken take one for the team? Then check out "Pop Culture Princess" by Elizabeth Whitney, a solo performance that is sure to shed new light on your adolescence.

by Kirsten Fatland
dir by Beth Raas
10 min

Sinkhole is a darkly humorous exploration of how an event can be a catalyst for significant life changes, though perhaps only a convenient pretext for change. Then what happens if the catalyst falls into a sinkhole?

Sulphur Creek
by Jessica Staley
dir by Sarah Stillion
1 hr

"Let the scales fall from your eyes..." Ima Jean is the pillar of her rural church community. But past transgressions surface when, after a mysterious absence, a young man returns seeking a preaching position. The congregation is smitten with his charisma, as is the young granddaughter Ima Jean is attempting to raise and influence. These characters' faith lives on different trajectories and are set to collide.

The Ashes
by Kelleen Conway Blanchard
dir by Michelle Lewis
10 min

A naughty King to be, a sadistic nursemaid, a prophecy, a magic bird, and a corrupt ruling class losing their war. The Ashes is a creepy fairy tale that explores power and the notion of justice. Plus things explode and that's good fun!

The Edge of Blue Light                                             mature content
by Angela Counts
dir by Jackie Moscou
full-length reading

A reclusive Latin American scholar tries to find solace in her work as she battles HIV. She hires a young African American woman to help her finish her life's work and finds her courage in the most unlikely of places, personal history.

The Pedicure
by Helen Turner
dir by Tess Hardwick
25 min

The Pedicure is about a Salon which caters to women who can afford all the perks in life. It offers pedicures, massage with aromatherapy, and a special deep-heat treatment that's to die for. Whether or not the customers deserve the results is another question. The Pedicure was written by H.E. Turner, directed by Tess Hardwick, stage designed by Amy Craven, and features Jean Chemnick, Victoria Dicce, Rachel Jackson, Maria Mogavero, Michelle Patrick, and Shannon Sullivan.


The Persistence of Memory                                     adult theme
by Vickie Cheatwood
dir by Zanne Gerrard
14 min

Ironically, Dead Jane observes that watches and clocks are always smiling at her from advertisements and catalogs, always set at 10:10. In this time-stopping tale, Dead Jane relives a passionate affair with her husband's brother. Originally titled "10:10," it premiered in 1999 as part of Christmas at Ground Zero produced by Ground Zero Theatre in Dallas, Texas.


The Resurrection and Marketing of Mabo
by Mary Ann Boyd
dir by Caitlin Finne
30 min
Mary Ann has an alter ego. Her name is Mabo Jones. Mabo is assertive, imperious, confident - everything that Mary Ann is not. In this 30 minute show, everyone can learn how to bring out their inner Mabo’s, and more importantly, in today's world, how to sell them! It's a before and after makeover, it's a motivational speech, it's a business presentation, it's a musical cabaret act - it promises to be an extravaganza that's both ridiculous and sublime!


The Squirrel Wife
by Kimber Lee
dir by Carol Roscoe

1 hr reading
SaraLee St.Amour is just your average small town girl who happens to hustle pool on the side -- a fact which she judiciously hides from her fiance Robert. When a mysterious woman comes looking for her, and threatens to blow her cover, she is faced with an impossible decision which not even she could have predicted.


The Super Secret Road Trip'N Bonus Episode
writ/dir by Lou Clark
dramaturg Sarah Malkin

10 min


 The Yellow Wallpaper
Text by Charlotte Perkins Gilman, adapted by Rebecca Goldberg
dir by Rebecca Goldberg
30 min

A vivacious wife who craves excitement and adventure. A frail invalid with a slight hysterical tendency. A lunatic. Find out what happens when she finally gets a room of her own, but the wallpaper is really, really ugly. Three women playing one women playing all women struggle with these roles in monologues, chorus, movement, and the color yellow. Featuring the talents of Carolynne Wilcox and Jana Hutchinson.

Trapped                                                                      mature language
by Joy McCullough-Carranza
dir by Katjana Vadeboncoeur
1 hr

In a Chicago holding cell, three women from vastly different circumstances are thrown together for one stormy night. Assumptions, expectations and accusations collide as each must face the choices she's made. By morning, no one's life will ever be the same. With Dina Maugeri, Lisa Nix and Amber Wolfe.

You're Not Supposed to Be Here                            nudity
by Sally Dean
dir by Sally Dean & Amy Ragsdale
45 min

Combines text, movement, and music to create a surreal dark-comedy traversing a Waitress' psyche. The Waitress' nightmarish dreamscape is dominated by power struggles, birthday parties and bizzarre mating rituals. As the Waitress fights to maintain a physical and mental balance in her waking restaurant world of obligations and duties, her escapist fantasies slip further into fulfilling her dark-twisted desires that begin to run rampant and perhaps out of her control.